This just in: The outlook for Nokia sales are on the up and up. Also, music fans clamor for hard copy mentality. They claim that they do not enjoy buying things two or three times only for them to disappear. Phone gamers agree. Musicians and game devs are on board with this plan too -- they like making money and not getting ripped off, as it turns out. Is the Apple and Google reign of terror coming to an end? To be continued...
Breaking News: Cross-Chain Token Transfer Protocol, or CCTP, an application of block chain technology, almost slipped through the cracks -- until now... Forget http... That's old news, buddy... If someone else doesn't do this, I will. An internet accounting system which will be nigh-unhackable/uncrackable is on the horizon... I'm already developing my own SSL certificates (https), but with this new technology on the horizon, I may just go down the CCTP road for good... You'll see... you'll see... I hope this guy isn't in some concentration camp somewhere... His website is down. I may seek him out for an interview in the next couple of years. I'm going to save you stupid simian neanderthals from yourselves, one way or another, whether you want to be saved or not...
Someone send this back to Joe Biden in January of 2021 please: Hey Joe, please stop being such a cock block and do your job.
This just in: The fictional account of a polar magnetic realignment will not occur. I repeat, it will not occur. We will retain a right-handed system. All dogs go to heaven, Jesus always wins, etc... Earf will not just start rotating in the opposite direction tomorrow. Believe it or not, there are charged particles in there, etc, etc, please take these idiots off of TV kthanksbye... Put that in your shell pipe and parse it, Silicon Valley Nerd Land™, aka Palo Alto Networks. I actually emailed them telling them to please cease and desist from scraping my webserver with a list of IPs and domains, etc. I feel so violated... They won't stop... ; ;
That GUI doesn't GUI, do he?
Translation: I basically just reinvented Linux from Unix, because I hate hackers so much. Hopefully it's good enough. I may call my flavor Penix.
A rumor floating around the internet that "Elon Musk" was actually "born in prison" has not actually been confirmed. More convincing evidence suggests he was actually born in Bali, India. He just left Earth in "Starship" without saying goodbye. We may never know why he hated us so much that he couldn't even be bothered to say goodbye... He wasn't always annoying. He used to be halfway likeable. Until one day, when he owed people so much money that every single word out of his mouth made him more and more annoying every single day, until he became so annoying, no one could tolerate him any longer...
Fun fact: Hatorade Games™ caters to a different market sector than the next-gen system market sector. Quit screwing up their Christmas FOR NO REASON.
This just in: Universities across The United States of America are rumored to have decided unanimously to give admittance preference to US citizens, especially in graduate school. Further, the only foreigners they will educate in the future will be brilliant exceptions who are from nations with excellent standing in the international community and well-known friendly ties to American citizens already. The distinction between European Caucasian and Middle Eastern Caucasian on college applications is a good start. Full FBI background checks will be required. I have had one of those before, too; they are pretty standard in our country for any sort of position of responsibility. I've had a similar sort of background check in Brazil even more recently.
This just in: Sniffing glue gives you cancer everywhere but California, where apparently everything else causes cancer, especially when a business rival has a great idea. Really, guys? Nickel? Lead is harmless too, unless it gets in the water supply or is ingested. In any case, it gives you lead poisoning, not cancer. Where do they come up with this nonsense?
This just in: Cosmonauts at SpaceX have openly admitted to stealing identities of astronauts at N-Dimensional Engineering™
